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liberal party of australia

the inalienable rights and freedoms of all peoples to be exploited by big business; and we work towards a mean government that minimises freedom in the daily lives of minority groups; and maximises munney-makin'. Our price will never be beat, we will sell out for a title, or a free-trade agreement! In the rest of Australia, this would have been enough for a comprehensive Labor victory. This election showed how grossly distorted the Playmander had become; by this time, Adelaide accounted for two-thirds of the state's population, but elected only one-third of the legislature. Although a shadow of its former self, the reformed Country Party served as a wakeup call to Playford that there were problems within the LCL. The Labor party promptly seized power and set up a communist utopia Australia-wide, which fell 13 minutes later when someone from the right faction was silly enough to ask "how are we going to pay for it?". ]: nominal authority rests with Rupert Murdoch in his nuclear strike-resistant, underground compound on the other side of the world. Find the lastest News, Media Releases, Speeches, and Transcripts: HIA New Home Sales Data Continues To Demonstrate Homebuilder’s Phenomenal Success, Caring For Mental And Physical Health During The Pandemic, Prime Minister Opens New Military Vehicle Centre Of Excellence, Tax Relief To Back Hard-Working Australians And Create More Jobs Passes The Parliament, Homebuilder Delivering Stimulus For Tradies And Confidence For First Home Buyers, Tailored Careers Support For School Leavers, Australian Government finalises University of Queensland-CSL COVID-19 vaccine agreement, 2020-21 Budget: Supporting The Future Of Indigenous Australians, 2020-21 Budget – Manufacturing Australia’s Future. At the 1968 election, Labor won a 53.2 percent two-party vote to the LCL's 46.8 percent, but suffered a two-seat swing, resulting in a hung parliament. From the 1941 election onward, the Playford LCL would regain and keep a parliamentary majority, albeit narrowly. All was not lost, however: as Australians' had been escaping from their penal colony for centuries (primarily due to lax quarantine regulations), there were approximately 45 billion Aussies overseas at the time of Australia's unfortunate inundation. In celebration, he had thousands of Labor voters from western Sydney melted down and turned into bricks; just in time to aid the construction of the athletes villiage for the Sydney 2000 Olympic Games. Select Date: Year . Large-arsed I'm out? Butler then became the Premier of South Australia. Also, a GST will never be part of our policy.”. In 1996, the Australian people were turned into zombies by the new leader of the Liberal Party, Count Howard (also known as Darth GST), who sent out his unholy love-toys, the Australian Young Liberal Party to bite people and turn them into right-wing, souless demons. Hall remained as the Leader of the Opposition. Post Code. Labor finally beat the Playmander against the odds at the 1965 election. 2020-21 Budget Backs Water Reforms, Northern Australia And Resources To Support Economic... A Safer and Stronger Australia - Budget 2020-21. a firm belief that if you are not wealthy then it is your. Despite winning the same two-party vote as it had three years earlier, the Playmander was strong enough that Labor was only able to win government by two seats. What does the Liberal Party stand for? On 4 February 2013, Steven Marshall was elected unopposed as Liberal leader. Labor would regain their vote and majority at the 1977 election, however Dunstan resigned in the months prior to the 1979 election where the Liberals won government for one term. Despite this, the LCL party machine had become moribund as leaders had become lulled into a false sense of security due to the extended run of election wins aided by the Playmander. However, Labor picked up only a small number of additional seats. He made a deal with his lord Satan to return to the mortal realm, and terrorise the populace further. Ass-secks One vote one value would later be introduced by Labor following the 1975 election. Please don't hurt me...”, ~ Oscar Wilde on Liberal Party of Australia, ~ Left-wing Evil Communist Arsehole on The Liberals, The Howard years (and years, and years...), Relationship to the Australian Labor Party, Grand Theft Auto VI: The Siege of Kirribilli House, https://uncyclopedia.ca/w/index.php?title=Liberal_Party_of_Australia&oldid=5968071, Things that God hates according to Fred Phelps. government that nurtures its citizens through human farming similar to that seen in The Matrix. This split mirrored the dissatisfaction amongst the Establishment faction, which had been steadily losing its power within the party and was appalled at the "nouveau riche (new money) commoners", such as Millhouse, that had infiltrated the parliamentary wing of the LCL. Australia then promptly sank into the ocean whence it rose - the few survivors then ironically became boat people, and were rapidly torpedoed by Indonesian anti-immigration patrols. News. They shared a common belief that Australians should have less personal freedom and choice than that offered under Labor's evil socialist plans. that the mining industry is more important than the environment. Since the 1970s, six parliamentary Liberal deputy leaders have served as Deputy Premier of South Australia: Roger Goldsworthy (1979–1982), Stephen Baker (1993–1996), Graham Ingerson (1996–1998), Rob Kerin (1998–2001), Dean Brown (2001–2002), and Vickie Chapman (2018–present). Find the lastest News, Media Releases, Speeches, and Transcripts: Filter by category . Under the scheme, a vote in a low-population rural seat had anywhere from double to ten times the value of a vote in a high-population metropolitan seat. A year later, the LCL received another jolt with the reformation of a separate Country Party. The Liberal Party of Canada steadfastly believes in LGBTQ2 rights and women’s rights, and sees Canada’s diversity as our greatest strength. [8] This would be the last time that a Liberal leader was elected unopposed until 2013. Historians generally agree that only the fact that he had an authentic Ashes commemorative cricket bat - signed by Mark "Tubby" Taylor, no less - allowed him to survive the altercation at all: as the mob dropped to their knees to worship the bat, Howard retreated to the kitchen, hid in a chest freezer, and then soiled himself. swearing allegiance to Her Majesty Queen Eliza... no, to His Imperial Bigness George Dubya Bush and the United States of America. Bruce Eastick succeeded Hall as LCL leader after Hall's resignation from the party in 1973. In the video - allegedly shot shortly before the Tampa incident in 2002 - he is shown demonstrating the most effective (and satisfying) methods of throwing children overboard. wherever possible, government should not compete with an efficient private sector; and that businesses - not government - should be in charge. The party also revised its constitution, adopted a new platform, appointed new young party officials and organisers, modelling after the Victorian Liberals.[7]. For the party in Western Australia also named Liberal and Country League between 1949 and 1968, see, CS1 maint: multiple names: authors list (, Liberal Party of Australia (Western Australian Division), Liberal Party of Australia (Victorian Division), Members of the South Australian House of Assembly, 2018–2022, Members of the South Australian Legislative Council, 2018–2022, Australian Labor Party (South Australian Branch), Factional war is definitely coming to SA: InDaily 12 July 2017, Liberal Party of Australia, South Australian Division: SLSA.sa.gov.au, "Liberal Party of Australia (N.S.W. Political commentators congratulated him on his timing: a sudden, massive, and completely-unrelated increase in people dying in the streets from preventable diseases - the growing pile of dead bodies was also inconveniently blocking several Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras floats - could now be cleared and buried easily, with the government-owned earthmoving equipment purchased from the savings. The Playmander was named after LCL leader Sir Tom Playford, who was the Premier of South Australia for 27 years from 1938 until his election loss in 1965. The Liberal Party fought its first election in 1946 with some success: the battle went well and Liberal demons managed to devour the souls of ten Labor senators. The party has been led by Premier of South Australia Steven Marshall since the 2018 state election; their first win in twenty years. Due to a leadership spill involving Tony Abbott, Malcom Turnbull and an unpeeled Onion of dubious origins, the current leader is Malcom Turnbull[citation needed] (Praise be Unto Him), controlled by puppet master and journalism monopolist Rupert Murdoch. Credible rumours circulate that these remaining, stateless Aussies are planning to go to war with New Zealand for control of the former Australian Antarctic territory, and declare a new Australia; further rumours of growing pineapples, mangoes and beer on the ice after their almost-certain victory have also recently been substantiated[Of course not!]. Lying is perfectly fine if it gets us re-elected. His fears proved to be unfounded, however - despite widespread electoral fraud, he and the Liberal party managed to hold onto power with a slim 47% to 53% victory over Labor on the two-party preferred vote. Lying. Add your name 2020 Summer Check-In Survey. Anecdotal evidence suggests Labor shit smells like burning public money and the BO of lazy welfare recipients[citation needed], while Liberal shit smells more like the partially-digested remains of underpaid workers spat out by big business - but more controlled studies are hard to come by, and are often distorted by ideology. During Eastick's leadership, the Liberal and Country League met at the State Council meeting on 22 July 1974 to rename itself to "Liberal Party of Australia (South Australian Division)". Latest State News. The Labor party claimed they had nothing to do with bribing the Japanese navy to snatch Holt nor, they claimed, did they provide any information about his whereabouts, patterns of behaviour, or his 50 metre freestyle performance. The party's problems had already emerged in public spats, most notably the formation of the Liberal Movement, a socially progressive or "small-l liberal" wing of the LCL in 1972. The lone independent in the chamber, Tom Stott, threw his support to the LCL, allowing Hall to form a minority government. Concerned by the level of publicity and public protest about the issue, Hall committed himself to reducing the rural weighting. Take the survey A Ban on Assault-Style Weapons in Canada. Under his watch, the lower house was expanded 39 to 47 seats, 28 of which were located in Adelaide. In 1949 the Liberals, in coalition with the Country Party - an obscure group of deluded hillbilly bumpkins - waged an unholy war against the Labor party chanting, "We reject your equality and replace with EVIL!!eleven11! Name. Two-thirds of seats were to be located in rural areas ("the country"). Satan himself was reportedly quite amused at these developments, and after he finished his extensive ROFL session, also joined the Liberal Party. The name was chosen because Menzies thought it was hilariously ironic to have a name that represented the opposite of what they stood for[citation needed].

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